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Figaro In London

14/01/1832

Printer / Publisher: W. Molineux 
Volume Number:     Issue Number: 6
No Pages: 4
 
 
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Figaro In London

Date of Article: 14/01/1832
Printer / Publisher: W. Molineux 
Address: 13 Rolls Buildings, Fetter Lane
Volume Number:     Issue Number: 6
No Pages: 4
Sourced from Dealer? No
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FIGARO IN LONDON. Satire should, like a polish'd r^ zor keen, Wound with a touch that's scarcely felt or seen.— LADY MONTAGUE. " Political Pasquinades and Political Caricatures are parts ( though humble ones,) of Political history. They supply information as to the personal habits, and often as to the motives and objects of public men, which cannot be found elsewhere."— CHOKER'S NEW WHIO GUIDE. No> 6.] SATURDAY, JANUARY 14, 1832. [ Price One P e n n y. CASS Or SURFEIT EOT A BISHOP. WE, this week, submit to our readers the report of a case of recent" occurrence which happen in the " Hospital of Incurables ;" and, though it excited a great deal of conversation ait the time, will, before long, again become the subject of discussion. We have presented to the Public a detail of the circumstances connected with the affair up to the present period; and though we have hazarded a sequel of our own, we believe that many will be found to concur with us on tlie probability of our conclusion. The patient is a Bishop, whose complaint is a surfeit, brought on by a course of living unparalelled in the annals of grossness and gluttony. The unfortunate individual has for some time indulged a propensity for feeding on whatever happened to come in his way,— indeed one- tenth of the produce of the whole country has been devoted to the gratification of his almost insatiable appetite. He swallowed up pigs, corn, and poultry, with an equal relish ; and, indeed, seemed to consider as Iiis own by right, a tithe of all that had been created by the industry or ingenuity of others. The only article which the Bishop ever thought of offering, as a kind of set- otf to his ottn enormous annual consumption, was, lecturing other people, on the wickedness of thinking about this world's good things, with which lie took particular care they should not be overburdened. This system had been carried on for some time, when, it becoming palpable to others, that the Bishop never thought of practising what he preached, it was at length unanimously resolved, that the right reverend fdther in God, as he had been somewhat facetiously styled, had been for some time hoaxing the whole community. Persons began to compare his doctrines with his acts : they heard him extolling the virtues of humility in churches to which he had driven in a gaudy equipage; tliey found him strongly insisting on the necessity of acts of charity, and at the same time enforcing rigourously against the poor his claim to one- tenth of the little they possessed. Taking all these matters into consideration, it became very obvious to all, that the Bishop had been carrying on a system of fraud, and that he had only been dissuading others from paying too mucb regard to tho body and too little to the " soul, because it would be impossible for him to do so himself if many others were to insist on following liis example. The imposition having been detected, a general clamour was raised against the injustice of one man stuffing himself with good things to the detriment of millions of others; and it was declared to be nothing more than fair, that the Bishop should not only be prevented from continuing to do so, but it was even urged by some, that he should be made to disgorge that which lie had already consumed. Accordingly, he was put under the treatment of Dr. Grey, who, like a good, physician, warned him of his very dangerous situation, and advised him to set himself in order, and take such medicines as might be prescribed, in order to prevent the necessity of applying the stomach- pump, which would only be resorted to as an extreme remedy. On first coming under the c^ re of this experienced practitioner, the Bishop was almost in the last stage of surfeit. Dr. Grey, calling in the assistance of Dr. Russell, Nurse Brougham, and other eminent persons, resolved on administering soothing medicines, and endeavouring as far as possible to allay the irritation which raged in every part of the bloated body of their over- fed patient. They consulted 22 FIGARO IN LONDON. together for a short time, and at length succeeded in preparing an admirable purge, which it was hoped would fully answer the end they had in view, and at the same time obviate the " necessity of applying a stronger medicine. They had flattered themselves they might have effected in reality a radical cure, without resorting to those violent emetics which would have caused a convulsion in the patient's body; but no sooner was the healing measure hinted at, 110 sooner was the purge made the topic of conversation, than the Bishop began to talk very incoherently, and to throw up a quantity of virulent matter. Hearing, indeed, that the draft was being prepared in the lower " Hospital of Incurables," he bribed those below to endeavour to dilute its strength; and this attempt failing they took an opportunity of throwing it out of the house altogether. A second effort was however made by the doctors, ' and they succeeded in getting the dose carried into the apartment of the Bishop, but there was no possibility of inducing him to swallow i t ; he talked wildly, went into frightful convulsions, and though Nurse Brougham went down on his knees to implore the patient to let it pass, having received it into his mouth, he rejected it with frantic violence. As he has refused to yield to the gentle remedies prescribed by those who have taken the trouble to endeavour to restore him to health, we know not what plan may be hereafter of necessity resorted to. Had he calmly consented to take the purge advised for his benefit, no stronger specific would have, probably, been thought o f ; but should the cry be raised, that the Bishop must be made to disgorge, what can he expect but the vigourous application of the stomach- pump ? Should this expedient be put into operation, we cannot trust ourselves to foretell the result, we must leave it to the pencil of the caricaturist. THE INTERPRETER. majestic Killers. " ROYAL FRACAS.— The recent marriage of the Infante Don Sebastian to a Neapolitan Princess, has given rise to some violent scenes in the interior of the Royal Family at Madrid. A warm discussion on the subject ensued between the mother, the son, and some other members of the family. The mother was irritated to such a degree, that she attacked her son, in a violent fit of rage, and, but for the interference of those present, she would probably have inflicted upon him a mortal blow. The Princess was with some difficulty appeased ; and to obviate the recurrence of similar scenes, the King has ordered that the door communicating from her apartments to those of her son? shall be fastened up."— Court Journal. THE Interpreter is a most awkward test for the actions of Royalty, bringing them down unceremoniously to what they really are, and shewing the follies or delinquencies of the great in their only proper colours. Here, for example, in the smooth language of the Court Journal, we are made acquainted with the particulars of what it mincingly terms a Royal Fracas ; but after all, is it not a mill, a regular set- to, which has occurred between the Spanish Prince, and his, of course, elegant and accomplished ( because royal), mother ? We, having no respect for persons, estimate all according to their conduct, and when we find a Royal Family degrading itself to the level of prize- fighters, we deal with it iti the same manner as we should treat any other nest of blackguards. We can imagine the coarse abuse that must have passed between the contending parties, previous to their becoming so irritated as to proceed to blows:— we can then imagine the Queen- mother putting in a smasher ( we suit the word to the action,) into the face of the Infante. We fancy we see the young Prince regularly floored by the imperial bunch of fives, and coming to the scratch, on rising, with redoubled energy. Then the interposition of the rest of the family, with the separation and locking up in different rooms— a measure which it seems the King has, from necessity, adopted. On the following day, too, the black eyes of one? or perhaps both, must have presented at Court a very majestic appearance. If scenes like these were made public as frequently as they occur, the palace of Madrid would not be found the ronly one which is occupied by individuals with an elegant propensity to the habits of the fancy. If all their actions could but be brought under the test of the Interpreter, kings, queens, princes, and princesses, would be found quite as decided scamps ( to use an expression dictated by the subject,) as very many of their inferiors. There was scarcely a nightconstable in London who had not, at some time, a recent King of this country in custody, for disorderly conduct in the streets, and yet this very same fellow used to be called by some, the most finished gentleman in England. Had he been but born in an humble sphere, his propensities prove, that he would probably have spent half his life at the tread- mill, as an incorrigible vagabond. The love- sick Leopold. " If we are to believe those who profess to be in the secret, there can be but little doubt that the projected marriage of King Leopold with one of the French Monarch's daughters, is an affair of mutual inclination ; at least, there seems no doubt that it is an affair of the heart on his side."— Court Journal. A disinterested attachment between two members of Royal families, is at least something new, when the marriages resulting from them are generally entered into as mere matters of political accommodation. Should the attachment of Leopold be really sincere, a consideration for his feelings should have prevented the Court Journal from giving publicity to a paragraph which follows in the same column, and which, should it meet his eye, must occasion the deepest anguish to the King of Belgium. The paragraph to which we allude, announces the interruption to the negociations on the subject of the proposed alliance— one of the causes of which, we are informed, is an affaire de cwur previously existing between the lady and a young officer with more personal than pecuniary qualifications. Is it not but too evident that poor Leopold is not the 23/ FIGARO IN LONDON. favoured lover, and that Miss Louise d'Orleans has been flirting with a handsome French officer? There is an amusing inconsistency in the two accounts, which is the more striking, as they appear within a few lines of one another, in the same column of the same page of the same paper. In one place, the affection is declared to be mutual— in the other, the Princess is presumed to have an affaire de cceur with a young French officer. One, at least, of the two statements must be false, unless the young lady can love two at a time, and we know that extraordinary licenses are sometimes granted to Royalty. Fair Game. " The Duke of Cumberland, accompanied by a party of gentlemen, had a day's shooting on Wednesday, atWaithara Cross."— Court Journal. WE have only quoted the above paragraph because it struck us, as something remarkable. Had his Royal Highness the Duke of Cumberland really had a day's shooting on Wednesday, we should not be troubled with any further opposition to Reform from the same exalted quarter. The Court Jouvnal, we suspect is for once waggish, and merely means to hint, that a day's shooting is what the Duke of Cumberland is entitled to. The Female Fan- ey. " Among the caprices of fashion may be reckoned the almost total disuse of the fan, which is now scarcely seen even in a ball- room. At Madrid, on the contrary, the Spanish ladies wield it as a most powerful weapon— often accomplishing more effects by its dexterous use, than even by means of their dark, fascinating eyes."— Morning Herald. It appears from the above paragraph that the Royal Family of Madrid is not the only one in that quarter of tho globe which has a propensity to pugilism. The fan, it seems, has not gone out of fashion, but it has been perverted from its ancient use, t o be wielded by the Spanish ladies as a most powerful weapon. They have taken, we suppose, to breaking heads, instead of hearts, and have found black eyes so fascinating in tliemelves, that they have resolved on trying their eflcct on their male companions. A general Settler. " By the Mexican laws, if a man kills another in a duel, he becomes answerable for all his debts."— Morning Paper. I f this law did but prevail in England, the custom of duelling might at least be turned to account; for a man whose life might be embittered by debt, need not give himself the trouble of committing suicide, but by selecting a rich man for the task of shooting him, he performs in his last moments an act of justice to his creditors. However desirable it may be that parties who quarrel should give satisfaction to one another, how much more desirable would it be to extend the sphere of satisfaction to those who survive ; and when called to his last account, how pleasant to the murdered man to reflect that he has left no account standing with his creditors. BREVITIES. " Brevity is the soul of wit."— Shakspeare. For Saws to Peck at. The Baroness de Feucheres, who is an Englishwoman, appears to have treasured her country's proverbs in her memory. " When there's a will, there's a way," seems to have been the maxim she acted on, when, having got the will, she made a way in the case of the Duke de Bourbon. Very Fair% ame. Sir Charles Wetlierell bas lately, we understand, been on a shooting excursion, and, notwithstanding certain prejudices, has frequently been known to express his pleasure at being able to j bring down the game in braces. A Strong: Tie. The will of the Duke de Bourbon, who was found hanged, is now the theme of universal discussion. There appears to be no doubt as to who were his executors. Ready to Turn Round. Some of the anti- reformers seem only to interest themselves in the common wheel, that they may do all they can to set it in revolution. A Warm Friend to the People. Sir Charles Wetherell has during the late inclement season, been busy in the distribution of firing in the neighbourhood of Bristol. Reform considered Meet. A starving manufacturer lately expressed a hope, that when the Reform Bill should pass, he would be entitled to the benefit of some of its provisions. Petticoat Government. We are informed that Lord Eldon has been applied to by tho Committee of the Female Political Union to accept the office of President. Sophia so Fiery. Considering the suspicious circumstances under which the Duke de Bourbon came by his death, one might naturally have expectcd to find the Dawes bolted. Making light of the Matter. The addresses now publishing by the honourable member for Preston are said to be inflammatory;— at all events, they cannot be appropriated to a more suitable purpose than lighting fires. A Ziight Affair. We find from the papers, that his grace, the Duke of W e l - lington, since bis approach to recovery, has taken light food; — we presume he is not hoarded as he used to be. A Profitable Coalition. The new coal- act shews an anxiety on the part of Ministers, to carry home reform to our very hearths. Migrations ( My Gracious). Should the system of emigration be carried into effect, we hope the first to quit the country will be the parsons, who are, in every sense of the word, surplice population. Epigram on the Duke of Cumberland's Consistency. That he's ne'er known to change his mind, Is surely nothing strange ; For no one yet could ever find He'd any mind to change. Not to be lightly Treated. The motions made in the House of Commons by Mr. Hunt, have so much weight, that he naturally finds the greatest difficulty in getting them carried. THEATRICALS. Mr. C. Kcmble having at length recovered from his late attack, appeared on Monday in the part of Mercutio, Juliet being played by Miss Fanny, and Romeo being consigned to her cousin, Mr. Mason. We perfectly coincide with the propriety of Kemble's resigning the character into abler and younger hands ; the absurdity of an old fellow, upwards of fifty years of age strutting about the stage like a stripling of fifteen always forcibly struck us. It is true, we always had in C. Kemble the whining tone and lackadaisical action of a love s i c k * hobbledehoy ; but it was the mawkishness of love, * Neither a man nor a boy. 260 FIGARO IN LONDON. without its more bearable qualities. It was high time to do away with these sort of goings on at Covent- garden, and if Miss Fanny Kemble has done nothing else by appearing on the stage, she has at least put an end to those exhibiions of folly, in which her father had for so many years been previously indulging. But we had hoped that old Kemble would have taken care to have provided a remedy, at least not worse, if not better than the evil ; but in thrusting Mr. Mason iuto the part of Romeo, he has selected a representative even more disagreeable than himself for the character. Why was not Mr. Abbott called upon to fill it? he, with all his inefficiency would have been more bearable than the last named gentleman, who was evidently chosen on account of his relationship to the manager. We very much doubt, whether the getting up a snusr family party to perpetrate the principal characters in a tragedy, can be found profitable t o the proprietors, however agreeable it may be to those immediately concerned. A lengthy critique on Mr. Mason's performance would, after what we said in our last week's number, be more than superfluous. The only new feature in it, was a decided tendency to premature suicide, for he began to murder Romeo directly he came upon the stage, without waiting to do so in the regular way at the conclusion of the tragedy. Mrs. Gibbs was uncommonly coarse in the character of the nurse, which is sufficiently gross without the embellishments imparted to it by the lady last mentioned. At her time of life she ought to know better, her fascinations are not so great, that she can afford to excite a little disgust by way of a foil to their captivating qualities. As there is little doing at the large houses, we can afford to say a few words about the minors, from mentioning which more frequently, we have by our contracted space been hitherto prevented: It will be found, however, from an advertisement in the last page, that we' intend shortly publishing a critical work, in which we shall be able to afford to the drama, more than our usual attention. The fact is, it encroaches too much on the limits of the present publication, which in future will not contain more than the last page of theatricals. We take this opportunity, while we are on the subject, of informing our numerous subscribers, that we purpose giving them a work, which shall carry into the field of literature, the same principles as we have already maintained in politics. But we must not introduce a prospectus in this place, but will recur to the subject of the minors. Their efforts are of course greatly cramped by the attempts now making to subdue them, and though several of the small establishments have companies well worthy of the legitimate drama, it is to them forbidden ground, and they are per force confined to burletta and melo- drama. Many of these are, however, of a very entertaining character, and we strolled a few evenings since into the Garrick, where we were considerably amused by Thirty Years of a Gambler's Life, which was in many parts very creditably acted. We are unacquainted with most of the performers names, but the bill informed us that the principal character of Warner was supported by Mr. Cooper, a gentleman in whom it found a very able representative. The house is too far east for us to pay it a frequent visit, but our omission promises to be supplied by a new contemporary, devoted principally to the drama, which has lately risen up under the title of the Citizen, affording to that end of the town a cheap and amusing periodical. As we have been talking about tlie minors, it may be as well to give a hint to Messrs. Yates, and J. Reeve of the Adelphi, who we are informed by a correspondent, are intoxicated every evening, to the great disgust of the decent part of the audience, and to the detriment of the performance. We seldom visit this place for various reasons. First, the boxes are inconvenient and uncomfortable. Secondly, a system of sitting in bonnets prevails among the female portion of the audience, a nuisance encouraged by Mr. Yates, who not long ago, refused to attend to the complaint of a person, whose view of the stage was hindered by one of those unaccommodating beings in petticoats, the thickness of whose heads renders necessary a corresponding broadness of bonnet. In tlie third place, the pieces played are always stale, and not often of a kind to be seen twice without lassitude. A NEW drama under the very silly title of My Own Lover, has been advertised at Drury Lane for Wednesday evening ; but we really cannot deviate from our regular course, which compels us to go to press at too early a period of the week, to enable us to speak of any thing which transpires in the theatres after Tuesday evening. Our very large impression, or, as it is technically called, the heavy number we have to print, will not let us stop for new pieces, and indeed our readers would gain nothing by i t ; for, were we to notice them, our number would sometimes be heavy in more senses than one. We are told, My Own Lover is from the pen of Mr. Rodwell: — the name seems to promise a good subject for the razor of Figaro. We will not, however, prejudge, but will next week speak on the subject with sincerity. TO A D V E R T I S E R S. We have been solicited by several persons to insert advertisements, but we are unwilling to infringe on the space usually devoted to readable matter. We have, therefore, come to the resolution of taking a limited number, but we are quite indifferent whether we insert even a few ; we shall charge them according to the following scale :— Seven lines, or under 10s., and Is. per line for every line over. A N S W E R S TO C O R R E S P O N D E N T S. The charade of A. B. C. is clever, but it is on a subject unsuited to the character of this publication. We are obliged to J . H., but his contribution is not of a sufficient political character for the pages of the Figaro. Nos. 1 and 2 are ; now reprinted, and may be had at the publishers.— No. 3, with the portraits of THE POLITICAL BURKERS, will in a few days be reprinted.— No. 4, with the Pantomimic Characters, is still on sale at the publishers. — No. 5 contains a Caricature o f t h e TORY PARTY. OH Saturday, February 3d, 1832, will be published, No. J. price one penny, of A NEW WEEKLY PERIODICAL, CALLED F I G A R O A C R I T I C: ( By the Editor of Figaro in London.) It will be devoted to Reviews, Literary Squibs, Original Articles, and Notices of the Drama. Each Number to be embellished with a Caricature by SEYMOURProspectuses may be had o f t h e publisher, W. STRANGE, 21, Paternoster Bow, where all communications for the Editor are to be addressed. NEW WORK FOR THE NEW YEAR. This day is published, No. 3. with THREE Engravings, by B. STEILI., Paternoster Row, and Sold by all Booksellers, A New LIBERAL, MORAL, and INDEP E N D E N T WEEKLY R E V I E W of BOOKS, the STAGE, and the F I N E ARTS, entitled, T H E L I T E R A R Y T E S T; Consisting of Sixteen closely printed Quarto Pages! No Advertisements being admitted!'. Price enly Tvvo- Pence !!! On Saturday next, price One Penny, with occasional Engravings by CRUIKSHANK, and others, N O . I . OF A SLAP AT THE CHURCH. " Grave and gay, lively and severe" Published by W. STRANGE every Friday evening, and sold by all Booksellers. FINE ARTS.— In February, or the beginning of March, 1832, will be published, No. I. of a New Work, ( to be continued Weekly, price three- pence) under the title of T H E S T U D I O, To be'solely dedicated to the purposes, and honestly devoted to the interests of the Fine Arts. In announcing this work for publication the Proprietors strongly deprecate the idea of its being started in opposition to, or rivalry or competition with any other periodical devoted to the same pursuits. It has been projected with a view to counteract the mischievous effects produced upon the public mind, by the narrow, short- sighted, and illiberal mode of criticism upon art usually adopted at the present day. Each number will contain sixteen pages octavo, consisting of reviews of works on or relating to a r t ; critiques upon public exhibitions, or private collections ; original papers; and a variety of miscellaneous matter, interesting alike tfythe artist and amateur. All advertisements will be printed separate, and stitched inside the wrapper. N. B. The proprietors will feel obliged by any suggestions respecting the work, addressed by letter, post paid, to the Editor, at Mr. Richardson's, 245, High Holborn. Prin ted by W. Molineux, 13, Bolls Buildings, Fetter Lane. PUBLISHED BY W. STRANGE, 21, PATERNOSTER ROW.
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